On this episode of 20Twenty, Paul Ninnes joins us to explore how our online world influences personal relationships and how churches can gently guide men towards wholehearted integrity. For the first time ever, a majority of men in Christian congregations have been challenged by exposure to explicit digital content. But Paul believes this “demands an open conversation rather than silence.”
Paul recalls his first encounter with unsuitable images at age eleven. It was a moment that brought a tide of confusion and guilt for which he was not prepared. Then in his late teens, a partner discovered some of his private struggles. Paul saw firsthand how unaddressed issues can damage trust. That realisation led him to recommit to biblical values. He chose Job 31:1 as his daily safeguard: “I made a covenant with my eyes not to look lustfully at a young woman.”
Guiding Men Towards Wholehearted Integrity
To help men find freedom, Paul outlines three practical pillars:
- Eyes – take “custody of your eyes” by praying scripture as a shield in moments of temptation.
- Heart – invite the Holy Spirit to heal desires through honest confession and the assurance of forgiveness.
- Mind – renew your thinking by repeating positive choices, drawing on the brain’s ability to form new, healthy patterns.
No one should walk this path alone. Men need trustworthy companions and supportive groups. Something many churches have yet to offer. To fill that gap, Real Talk International has introduced the Stout-Hearted program, an eight-week course designed to help congregations build safe spaces for personal growth.
Paul offers this encouragement to those who are struggling: “There is great hope,” he says. “God wants to smash your shame and lead you on a path of healing and holiness.”
By focussing on discipleship, community and biblical truth, churches can help men reclaim freedom and live out the joy God intends for their marriages, families and personal faith.
Listen to Paul’s full interview below:
