Let me take you now to another radio moment, this time on BBC Radio 2, where I got to share a key moment that helped Merryn and me walk forward as a childless couple. Here’s what listeners said afterwards:
Just WOW. That was super powerful…
We need to hear more stories of people surviving like this. A new beginning is out there…
This brought me to tears…
See how people hunger for hope?
See why creating truly inviting community is vital?
Here’s what I shared:
There’s No Moving On Without This
Imagine for a moment a car parked in a suburban street with its doors open and two women standing by. The car is packed full of baby stuff—a pram, a stroller, a highchair, a playpen, with bags of toys and clothes filling the spaces in between.
One of those women is my wife, Merryn. The other is my sister-in-law, Kristy, who runs a hand over her baby bump, gives Merryn a hug, then gets into the car. Seconds later she’s driven all that baby stuff away—stuff it took Merryn and me a decade to accumulate.
Christmas 2010 had been shaping up like no other for Merryn and me. Having spent ten years trying to start a family through IVF, special diets, a three-year wait on the Australian adoption list, and more—we’d been told we were pregnant. Finally we were having a child! Then on Christmas Eve Merryn got a call from the clinic. She listened, hung up, then curled into a foetal position. It had been a false-positive. With that, our dream of having a baby ended.
We were left with so many questions. Why do negligent people get kids while good people don’t? Why had God seemingly ignored our prayers? Eight years on, some of those questions remain. But our story has also moved on.
Because what we didn’t know then was that Merryn and I would soon leave Australia for a new adventure here. Merryn would get a dream job in Oxford. I would get to write about our experience. We would see our marriage strengthened, new friendships formed, and an unexpected vocation begin helping others start again from their own broken dreams. Purpose would emerge from our pain. We’d see God use our experience to bring hope to others.
Surprisingly, Merryn wasn’t sad watching Kristy drive that baby stuff away. She felt relief. Because there’d be no moving on without grieving, and no grieving without relinquishing the symbols of our loss. Letting go of the pram, highchair and baby clothes was the beginning of us starting again.
Secretly, quietly, many couples struggling to conceive fear their lives will be meaningless if they don’t. What Merryn and I discovered was that when the loss is properly grieved, and then placed in the hands of God, even a broken dream like this can instead become a new beginning.
Article supplied with thanks to Sheridan Voysey.
About the Author: Sheridan Voysey is a writer, speaker and broadcaster on faith and spirituality. His books include Resilient, Resurrection Year, and Unseen Footprints. Get his FREE eBook Five Practices for a Resilient Life here.